Nayeen Al Amin

He Is “Online Dating” Another Woman. Do I Offer Him an Ultimatum?

Reader Question:

we came across a guy online which life 500 miles away. He’s 34 and I’m 53. The guy performed let me know he previously a lady he dated “locally” and this he was simply on the website shopping for friends. Three months later we recognized we thoughts per other.

Meanwhile, the guy nevertheless indicates he is having issues with his girlfriend, who isn’t some body he is “dating” in your area. He’s living with the girl plus they’ve already been with each other for four years.

At long last determined we’d to fulfill to find out if this was well worth following. The guy provided me with the main reason the guy didn’t imagine it had been to exercise as he had been together. I finally offered him an ultimatum and informed him i really couldn’t play second fiddle. The guy professed his really love but said he was really confused.

Would we provide him ultimatum, it is this lady or me personally? Are I wrong to ask him to create that decision?

-Nancy (Florida)

Dr Wendy Walsh’s Solution:

Oh Nancy, Nancy, Nancy! You wrote if you ask me for honesty, correct? Well, will you be sitting down? Because right here comes a honey pot of truth.

You will be staying in dream land, my dear woman. You’ve not also came across this individual which may be men and who may have a girlfriend.

We highly suggest you find the documentary “Catfish” (available on iTunes and Netflix) about an on-line love con.

But even if you you should not do this, let’s hypothetically say for a moment he’s really exactly who he states he is and disregard the reality the guy started writing for your requirements by sleeping about his union status.

Why don’t we simply go through the alleged insights.

A.) He’s almost twenty years younger than you.

B.) He’s in a critical union.

C.) The guy said right away he is only seeking to end up being friends.

And so I ask you, why is it possible you exposure your own cardiovascular system on these types of a terrible choice?

Practical question shouldn’t be about providing him an ultimatum, but alternatively, if you allow yourself the really love you deserve?

If yes, then this is simply not the pony you should drive inside sunset with. Operate, girl!

No counseling or therapy information: This site doesn’t provide psychotherapy information. This site is supposed limited to use by buyers in search of common info of great interest related to problems men and women may face as individuals plus connections and associated subject areas. Content material is not designed to change or act as replacement for expert assessment or service. Contained findings and views should not be misunderstood as particular counseling guidance.

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